Who Am I?

31 Jan

I am a stay at home mom, who follows my dream of being an author. Without any success of support, I learned that the only person I need is myself. I have two beautiful children, only two years apart. I started my family young unintentionally. I am super happy that I have. I am only 21, and discovered I could no longer bear anymore children.

I sat down one day and let the realization set in. I reflected upon my past and remembered one christmas when my grandmother handed me my fist notebook and pen. She told me, “Write my stories,” because when ever since I was eight years old, I loved telling her stories that popped up in my head. So I followed her instructions, and never looked back.

As I pondered my future, I noticed I almost forgot my ultimate dream. To become a best selling author. Even though, I am not, I never gave up the dream. I still hold true to that. I figured, “I am happy with the two children I was blessed with, even though I dreamt of having a big family. So I will write, and the characters will be my family as well.”

I am always getting into disputes with my in laws, about how writing is just a “hobby”, and I need to just stop being lazy and get a “real” job. I told them, “Last time I checked, you don’t get paid for doing a hobby.”

They still told me, that the pocket change I was only making, is not good enough, and that I need to get my head out of the clouds and throw away this gamble.

I look at them all, many times with teary eyes, and tell them to not bring me down.

Soon after I realized that I was alone on my endeavors. I did not have any friends, as I am an introvert, and searched far for any that would accept me.

There is a light to the end of this tunnel. I found a group of writers on facebook, that like me, faced the same challenges as me.

I wasn’t alone anymore, and when I asked them, “Did you ever give up on your dream, when others told you to do so?”

They just laughed and said with a chime, “I don’t care what others tell me to do. I know who I am, and who I want to be. No one will ever deter me from my dream.”

Many nights, I cried myself to sleep, feeling torn from myself, until I was able to find people who went through what I went through.


If you are looking for support, or feel the way I did, or just have questions about self publishing, please check out this group, Indie Author Group The title is the link to the facebook page. 

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Posted by on January 31, 2015 in Posts by Author, Who Am I?


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